2019-06-26 [My diary]
Some days ago, a senior business person from partner company said jokingly. "My first contact to you was about 20 years ago. I got yelled by you." I don't remember the contact.
I think he remember the contact correctly because he is trustful person and the scene he told is which I should agree about that I should do so if I was in the scene.
Anyway, I don't remember the scene. His explanation doesn't recall my memory.
But, I can't ignore the expression "got yelled by you". I know I may be more easily angered, I mean more intolerant than colleague around me. But, I don't like to get angry because anger is stressful, boring and tiring for me.
But, I wonder other people including him feel that I like to get angry.
I think he remember the contact correctly because he is trustful person and the scene he told is which I should agree about that I should do so if I was in the scene.
Anyway, I don't remember the scene. His explanation doesn't recall my memory.
But, I can't ignore the expression "got yelled by you". I know I may be more easily angered, I mean more intolerant than colleague around me. But, I don't like to get angry because anger is stressful, boring and tiring for me.
But, I wonder other people including him feel that I like to get angry.
A boring, stressfull topic [My diary]
This Japanese web page is a advisement column. This column answered to advise request "I'm disappointed in my life with full ups and downs. Sometimes I complain about my life to people around me. But, they usually told me that I'm not only person who suffers tough life."
https://cakes.mu/posts/25974
Answer from editor has some points. One of points is the reason of statement from people around consulter is that consulter's talk about life is boring and stressful so they don't want to hear consulter's talk.
I reached this column from twitter. Many people said this column is valuable and useful on twitter.
I remember a counselor said "everybody don't want to hear your talk" more than 10 years ago. I have negative feeling about his word still now. But, I have to agree my interest usually only focus me negatively and my talk is stressful and boring.
https://cakes.mu/posts/25974
Answer from editor has some points. One of points is the reason of statement from people around consulter is that consulter's talk about life is boring and stressful so they don't want to hear consulter's talk.
I reached this column from twitter. Many people said this column is valuable and useful on twitter.
I remember a counselor said "everybody don't want to hear your talk" more than 10 years ago. I have negative feeling about his word still now. But, I have to agree my interest usually only focus me negatively and my talk is stressful and boring.
What is the purpose of conversation? [My diary]
Recently, I had tried communicating my colleague in order to ask work to him.
As result, my communication didn't achieve my objective. More and more I tried explaining his work and my intention, less and less he might understand his work and my intention.
Conversation with him provided me a sense of futility every time even though he usually agreed to me about work. I wasn't sure why I felt so tired.
The reason why I described "my communication didn't achieve objective" is he threw his work because of "stress" as he said. He said "I can't complete my task because I can't understand what I should do" and he took 1 week off.
So, I think my communication didn't achieve my objective because my communication to him didn't keep him work.
I'm not sure what is exact cause which make him throw up work because the reason may be triggered by his feeling I can't see.
I think I have some point to be improved. One of the points is his conversation purpose may be different from mine.
He likes chatting. I felt he tried spinning conversation by means of irrelevant questions. I always answered his question and had to try redirecting our conversation.
I remember conversations with him and concluded that his purpose of conversation is conversation itself. He just enjoyed talking even though my purpose is to make him work.
So, he just enjoyed conversation and forgot understanding his work. And I assume that he found what he should do is work, not chat finally. So, he said "I feel stress about work. I can't understand what I should do".
Whether my assumption is right or not, I think I should take care about what is purpose of conversation when I discuss with other colleague.
As result, my communication didn't achieve my objective. More and more I tried explaining his work and my intention, less and less he might understand his work and my intention.
Conversation with him provided me a sense of futility every time even though he usually agreed to me about work. I wasn't sure why I felt so tired.
The reason why I described "my communication didn't achieve objective" is he threw his work because of "stress" as he said. He said "I can't complete my task because I can't understand what I should do" and he took 1 week off.
So, I think my communication didn't achieve my objective because my communication to him didn't keep him work.
I'm not sure what is exact cause which make him throw up work because the reason may be triggered by his feeling I can't see.
I think I have some point to be improved. One of the points is his conversation purpose may be different from mine.
He likes chatting. I felt he tried spinning conversation by means of irrelevant questions. I always answered his question and had to try redirecting our conversation.
I remember conversations with him and concluded that his purpose of conversation is conversation itself. He just enjoyed talking even though my purpose is to make him work.
So, he just enjoyed conversation and forgot understanding his work. And I assume that he found what he should do is work, not chat finally. So, he said "I feel stress about work. I can't understand what I should do".
Whether my assumption is right or not, I think I should take care about what is purpose of conversation when I discuss with other colleague.
2019-06-02 [My diary]
I have some experience that person whom I didn't have much interest to had interest to me in office.
I think that they had wrong impression to me because they might be lonely and they might feel that my attitude in business may be closer than other person they usually contact in office. As my business policy, I say thank you to person who take effort, time and/or concern to my business and my business asking. In Japan, many people don't say thank you to their colleague. (Of course, I know many person say thank you to their colleague.But, in my point of view, more people don't say thank you to their colleague than people say thank you to colleague.) Lonely people unused to thank you. My thank you may make them misunderstand that I have close feeling to themselves.
Or, they may be lonely and they thought I feel lonely same as them because I usually don't chat to other person and usually I work alone.
Anyway, person, who might have interest to me and whom I didn't have much interest to me seemed to try to become friend of mine. For example, they asked personal question, e.g. food I like, my hobby, school I graduated. Or they tried to chat to me outside of the office.
As result, their try was failed because I don't want business colleague to come closer to my personal life.
I think that my attitude may be overly friendly than appropriate business manner. I should pay attention to my attitude.
I think that they had wrong impression to me because they might be lonely and they might feel that my attitude in business may be closer than other person they usually contact in office. As my business policy, I say thank you to person who take effort, time and/or concern to my business and my business asking. In Japan, many people don't say thank you to their colleague. (Of course, I know many person say thank you to their colleague.But, in my point of view, more people don't say thank you to their colleague than people say thank you to colleague.) Lonely people unused to thank you. My thank you may make them misunderstand that I have close feeling to themselves.
Or, they may be lonely and they thought I feel lonely same as them because I usually don't chat to other person and usually I work alone.
Anyway, person, who might have interest to me and whom I didn't have much interest to me seemed to try to become friend of mine. For example, they asked personal question, e.g. food I like, my hobby, school I graduated. Or they tried to chat to me outside of the office.
As result, their try was failed because I don't want business colleague to come closer to my personal life.
I think that my attitude may be overly friendly than appropriate business manner. I should pay attention to my attitude.
